I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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