it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize