2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
