32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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