stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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