There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize