My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
