i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
The adults are the big ones right?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
