Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
