I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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