so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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