This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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