I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
