he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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