Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
