i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
