my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize