if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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