OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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