Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Randomize
