At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
