Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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