I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
