I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.
That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
