Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
