You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
