U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
