I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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