It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
