i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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