I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
babies were throwing up all over the place
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
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