You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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