im so drunk with asians
where?
always
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
