I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
