yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
