You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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