Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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