So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
