I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
