last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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