And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
