I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize