dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
