are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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