another moral hangover. fuck.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
