I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
