Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
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