How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
