remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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