remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
