It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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