those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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