I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
