if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
My bed is full of blood and feathers
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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